Just Call Me the Carpenter

Here, start this video while you are reading. It is called The Once and Future Carpenter 

by my favorite band, The Avett Brothers.  You'll see why in a minute.

Last Week
Weight: 241.6 lb (-6.2 lb, total of -19.8)

BMI: 34.7 (-.9, total of -2.8)

BMR: 2258 kcal (-66, total of  -118)

Fat %: 35.2% (+.1%, net loss of 6.8%)

Fat Mass: 85 lb (-2 lb, net loss of 25 lbs of cottage cheese)

FFM: 156.6 lb ( -4.2 lb, net gain of 4.8 lb)

TBW: 114.6 lb (-3.2 lb, net gain of 5.5 lb)

This Week

Weight: 237.6 lb (-4 lb, total of -23.8)

BMI: 34.1 (-.6, total of -3.4

BMR: 2233 kcal (-25, total of  -143)

Fat %: 33.8% (-1.4%, net loss of 8.2%)

Fat Mass: 80.4 lb (-4.6 lb, net loss of 29.6 lbs of belly jelly)

FFM: 157.2 lb ( +.6 lb, net gain of 5.4 lb)

TBW: 115 lb (+.4 lb, net gain of 5.9 lb)

Just call me the carpenter because I nailed it this week!  Since I started reblogging and rededicating myself, I've seen some major changes in my body.  Hell, I'm wearing a size Large dress shirt right now instead of the XXL that I started in two months ago.  I'm down three inches in my belly and an inch in my chest, butt (don't really need to lose more there), and arms.  My legs at mid-thigh went up an inch, but I attribute that to some of the muscle mass I'm building since the majority of my cardio is lower body focused.  Goal time!

Last Week's Goals:

Goal 1: See an Increase in Water Percentage - A
Hey everybody, come look!  I finally did it!

Goal 2: Hit the 20 lb. Loss Mark and Get Into the 230's - A+
Nail, meet hammer.  BOOM!  The best part of that is knowing that I have lost almost 30 lbs of fat mass.  

Goal 3: Push-ups and Sit-ups During Commercial Breaks - B-

First of all, I wasn't home all that much during the nights last week.  Secondly, I didn't watch much commercial TV.  Thirdly, I fell playing basketball on Thursday morning.  Fell hard.  I jumped somewhere in the neighborhood of nine feet in the air (a slight exaggeration, but it really was impossibly high for a man of my stature) in an effort to deflect a pass (which I did).  I thought everything was fine and dandy, but I should have been tipped off by the fact that everything was suddenly moving in slow motion.  The NFL generally only shows slow motion when someone breaks the rules, someone gets smoked, or someone gets injured.  Slow motion is bad news.  So, things all slowed down as I anticipated landing back down on feet.  When I passed the point where my feet should have hit the ground and my Spidey-senses started to figure out that I was horizontal instead of vertical, I made an effort to protect my head from bouncing off the court.  In the process, I landed on my elbow and my wrist.  Being a tough guy, I jumped up immediately after realizing I was still breathing and said, "I'm okay, I'm okay," even though my body was telling me otherwise.  Five plays later, I was playing defense and running backwards when I tripped on someone's leg and fell again on the exact same arm.  I knew I had jacked some stuff up, but I also knew it wasn't serious enough to need medical attention.  When I went home and tried to do my push-ups, I quickly realized that a tweaked wrist and elbow weren't going to be able to support my 240+ lbs., and as of Sunday, it still couldn't.  As I type I feel no after effects, so I'll give it another go. I did get my 40-60 sit-ups in most nights.

This Week's Goals:

Goal 1:  Eat Out No More Than Once
I'm not getting super loosey-goosey with the eating out routine, but I've started to see a pretty consistent patter of going out at least twice.  Those outings usually involve an appetizer that is more than my average meal, a meal that is 4x as much as my average meal, and two big beers that have more calories than my average meal.  Not this week, sir.

Goal 2:  Do At Least 20 Minutes on the Elliptical on Sunday

This goal is pretty narrow since it is a one and done deal, but I did it this Sunday and it made Monday a whole heckuva lot easier.  I thought I'd be smart and jump on during the last four minutes of the Vikings game, anticipating that I might get a 10-minute workout.  I quickly remembered why watching football live and in person is one of the worst experiences.  Between timeouts, instant reviews, TV timeouts, changes of possession, and the two minute warning, those four game clock minutes quickly hit 20 sweating my ass off minutes.  But the Vikings won, and the only logical reason they didn't piss that game down their leg was because I was on the elliptical.  Can't mess with a winning tradition.

Goal 3:  Make Christmas Come Early
I was a week late on hitting my November goal.  Time to be a week early on my December goal.  If I can drop 2.6 lbs this week, I'll hit my 235 December 25th goal on December 18.  That gives me a little more wiggle room through the holiday weeks (not to gain, but not to have to lose 5 lbs a week, either).

I will probably bust out another blog later in the week since class is over and my commute has doubled with the weather, giving me more than enough time to come up with nonsense that I guess I feel the need to share with the world.  Until then...

The Current and Future Carpenter,

Jeff "The Toolman" Tay...err...Pool

Would The Real Slim Jeffy Please Stand Up?

Forgive me for the brevity today, but I'm on a tight lunch schedule with a trip to Subway included.  I'll try to post again before the week is over, but here are today's results:

Last Week
Weight: 247.8 lb 

BMI: 35.6 

BMR: 2304 kcal 

Fat %: 35.1% 

Fat Mass: 87 lb 

FFM: 160.8 lb 

TBW: 117.8 lb

This Week

Weight: 241.6 lb (-6.2 lb, total of -19.8)

BMI: 34.7 (-.9, total of -2.8)

BMR: 2258 kcal (-66, total of  -118)

Fat %: 35.2% (+.1%, net loss of 6.8%)

Fat Mass: 85 lb (-2 lb, net loss of 25 lbs of cottage cheese)

FFM: 156.6 lb ( -4.2 lb, net gain of 4.8 lb)

TBW: 114.6 lb (-3.2 lb, net gain of 5.5 lb)

Goal 1 - Undo Last Week - A

I'm more than willing to pat myself on the back.  Not only did I lose the 3.6 lbs I gained last week, but I also managed to lose an additional 2.4 during my birthday week that featured a few celebratory dinners including this thing:

In case you're wondering, yes, it was amazing and yes, I did bring half of it home to eat the next night.  Somewhere under all of that shaved beef and horseradish is a burger.  As you are sitting there being outraged, remind yourself that I lost 6.2 pounds this week.  I also may have eaten a couple pieces of Oreo Blizzard Cake.  It was my birthday!

Goal 2 - Add a Weekend Workout - F-

I didn't do it.  In the immortal words of Forrest Gump, "That's all there is to say about that."

Goal 3 - H20, Agua, Eau, Wasser, Water!!! - C

I tried to be more mindful than I was the week before, but judging by the fact that I lost another three pounds of water, I didn't do a great job.  Guess that means...

This week's goals:

Goal 1: See A Water Percentage Increase

This goal shall remain until forward progress has been made.  

Goal 2: Hit the 20 Pound Loss Mark and Get Into the 230's

I'm sooooo freaking close.  I lost 25 lbs of fat, but I've offset that with gains to my monstrous guns.  I know this goal should be a gimme, but just like in the game of golf, I've missed my fair share of two foot putts.  Losing 1.6 pounds while gaining water weight this week could be a challenge, but I think I'm up for it.  That puts me in a really good position to hit my 235 goal by the end of December.

Goal 3: Push-Ups and Sit-Ups During Commercial Breaks

I should be home most nights this week, which means that I will be following the regular routine of sitting on the couch eating SmartOnes Peanut Butter Cup Sundaes while watching singing reality shows.  My goal is to do 60 sit-ups and 60 push-ups every night.  If I start watching TV at 6 and go to bed around nine, that means I have about 20 an hour to do, or 10 every half hour.  When I break it down that far, it doesn't seem so far out of reach.  I might need to build up to the 60 push-ups, but last night I busted out 20 on an incline pretty easily, so we'll see.  Feel free to roll off the couch and join me!

Finally, I just want to send out a huge congratulations to Molly and Shelbi.  They've started doing the 30 Day Crunch together (even though they live seven hours apart) and are really pushing one another.  We've all set weight loss goals and we are all making major strides towards them.  As of this morning's weekly check-in, we've lost over 50 lbs combined since the beginning of October.  I think I can speak for all of us when I say we'd like to get to a combined 100 lbs lost by Valentine's Day.  That might require another family member jumping in on the project (ahem, cough, cough), but it isn't out of the question for just the three of us.  Anyway, I'm really proud of Molly for getting up every morning at 5 to work out, especially when I get to lay there for another hour, and I'm really proud of Shelbi for making some major lifestyle changes and staying focused on our goal.  Our wedding party is getting smaller by the day.

Jeff